Scars

I had a chit chat with one of my best friend yesterday.

She said, "Kalo boleh memilih antara lu yang sekarang dan lu sebelum berpacaran... gw akan memilih lu yang dulu." She truthfully added, "Waktu lu masih pacaran lu beda. Sikap lu seperti ini.." And she demonstrated someone sitting with legs apart, hand on the knee, and the body bent to the front, "...kayak butchy..." She carefully added, "...seperti terlalu memaksakan diri. Gw dulu melihat lu seperti dimanipulasi, tapi gw ga bisa bilang apa-apa."

It's the first time she admitted this, and it made me thinking: I wasn't being myself in that relationship.

Talking about my changes again, jagungwati said, "Lu banyak menua sejak masalah itu. Sekarang sudah agak berkurang tapi masih ada sisanya."

Then it made think about scars. A wound hurts deeply, but eventually it will heal and become a scar. It will always be there as a reminder we can cope over that hurtful experience.

My wound is still healing, it hasn't become a scar, yet. But it will...